a great gift…

a great gift…

With only 53 shopping days left UNTIL CHRISTMAS, I would recommend this book as a great gift to your children. Girls and boys alike…because although for girls the statistics are higher for sexual violence, men/boys are not immune to violence via robbery, shootings and the like.

I’m less than 100 pages into the book and have already learned and or confirmed things I know from martial arts and self-defense. We don’t like to talk about violence (the news does) but we don’t. We like to bury our heads and HOPE that it doesn’t exist or that it won’t happen to us. BUT IS CAN AND IT DOES. We all need to figure out our “back up plan”. MOMS…I worry about you the most because you are distracted and busy. Figure out your plan to be safe and READY when you are with your kids! At the park, at the mall, grocery store, getting back into the car…never let your guard down, never look vulnerable!

The book teaches us to PAY ATTENTION to our natural instincts and NOT IGNORE FEELINGS and INSTINCTS! I have already learned from it!

Thanks for the recommendation Rudy, it was an excellent one!

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What’s your favorite memory?

What’s your favorite memory?

My mom could make ANY costume we wanted. We NEVER wore a store purchased costume. My mom always made them. They were always beautiful and perfect.

I was Little-Bo Peep in 5th grade and a French maid in 6th grade. I had the crooked stick for Bo-Peep and a non-nasty cute little French maid outfit complete with a pink feather duster! Every detail was always perfect with mom’s handmade costumes.

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My older sister wanted to be Jeannie from I Dream of Jeannie and her costume was exactly the same as the Jeannie we loved!

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Since my mom saves EVERYTHING I believe my kids even took advantage of grandmas homemade costumes! I didn’t buy my kids costumes either, but they never looked as good as my moms did.

I have great memories of Halloween and dressing up, because we always did it in style and we always got compliments on our beautiful costumes! …thanks mama.

 

one more thing…

one more thing…

Oprah is a genius!

I HEAR you!

Not, “I can’t wait until you’re finished so I can interject”…but rather… “I HEAR YOU”! Pause to listen, hear what others are saying, and wait…just wait to respond. Or maybe don’t respond at all. I’m WORKING on this. I want to be good at it. It is a challenge, so I’ll offer a challenge. Today when someone is talking to you, just listen and HEAR THEM. What a great way to begin the week. HAPPY MONDAY.

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the heart has to break, to open…

the heart has to break, to open…

Currently I’m reading Oprah’s book, “The wisdom of Sunday’s”. In one of the passages Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee says, “The heart has to break open”, “most people are so closed, it’s all about me, me, me.”

At some point in everyone’s life our heart breaks. It could be from a first love loss, the death of someone, divorce, seeing another suffer, conflict with parents, or a myriad of other things. At some point we all suffer a broken heart. And then… it opens and we are ready to figure out our purpose.

When we realize life’s journey is how we deal, not what is dealt, we begin to mature into the person we are destined to be.

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gait analysis

gait analysis

Do you sometimes feel pain in your knees, hips, back or feet especially during or after running or walking? It could be your shoes! If you are having any issues with pain or soreness of any sort, do a shoe check.

Years ago when I signed up to run my first marathon in my early 40’s our running coach took us to a fleet feet store to be properly fitted with the correct shoes. There is a perfected science to shoes and your particular running gait, called a gait analysis. I was skeptical but when I completed my marathon successfully, I became a believer.

I wanted to run a half marathon in Las Vegas 3 years ago, but that shoe was no longer available so I went to a running store here, went through the same process and found another shoe that has been keeping me healthy and happy.

I don’t run anymore now that I’m 59, but I love to walk for exercise. A forward motion shoe (running) is still recommended even if you are only walking. I wear a Brooks shoe now and I love it.

It’s very important to get a new pair of shoes every 500 miles. I am religious about this, and if my knees are a bit sore, or my back hurts more than usual… I am reminded it’s time for new shoes.

Stay healthy to stay active, stay active to stay healthy!

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a young mother seeking wisdom

a young mother seeking wisdom

Yesterday I read a face book post from a young mother who graduated from the same high school as my kids. She stated she reads a lot of articles and it seems like her generation (the current 30’s) is always talking about how hard it is to be a parent, the intense pressure, but she didn’t remember her mom feeling this way! She wanted some wisdom from us “older” folks…

Here are my thoughts:

First of all the fact that she is looking to older, experienced parents and asking for advise and wisdom says she is a good parent. I believe there is a LOT of help available and older folks are anxious to offer opinions about what we though worked, and what didn’t. We don’t get asked too often so that is a GREAT START. Find parents who’s kids you love and respect and ask them questions about what they did and what they “wish” now, they would have done better.

Secondly, the fact that every time you are frustrated or concerned as a parent and you can go type that out for the world to see, is a slight disadvantage. I’m sure there were plenty of days where I felt defeated and wanted to quit but I didn’t verbalize that (social media) to others…so within a few minutes or hours, things got back to normal and better and NO ONE KNEW I felt like I did for that short time.

  1. Kids are too over stimulated these days. Parents feel like kids HAVE to be on the go and active ALL THE TIME. However in that process they are not learning valuable lessons like entertaining themselves, down time and dealing with boredom. These are things they must learn in order for parents to keep sane and get stuff done around the house and for kids to grow into adults who can deal with down time and boredom. Reading, building, coloring, and playing outside, are a few things kids can do without TV and computers at which time parents can get other things done.
  2. The most valuable thing we did was be strict. RULES, CONSEQUENCES, and CONSISTANCY. Routine early bedtime, no phones or computers in the bedroom with kids. Simple chores and punishment for breaking the rules. Kids are SMART. If you continue to threaten and never follow through they pick up on that and know they will not suffer any consequences and therefore the rule isn’t necessary to follow. YOU CAN ALWAYS BACK OFF STRICKNESS later, but it’s VERY DIFFICULT to try and GET strict AFTER your kids are already in charge and running the house. Don’t ASK them if they are ready for bed. TELL them it’s bedtime! Don’t ask them if they WANT to take a bath! Tell them it’s bath time. Don’t ASK THEM if they want something to eat! SIT DOWN ALL TOGETHER at dinner time and give them a plate and require them to sit still until everyone is done. If they don’t eat a decent amount of healthy food, no treats! Kids absolutely need to learn to sit still and be patient and to wait.
  3. Spend TIME with your kids. Play with them to help them find their imagination. Offer ideas as they are playing to help build their imagination. Bake cookies together, go to the park, encourage outdoor activity (and then have your backyard safe so they can go play out there without you). Get off the phone, computer and away from the TV. Help them form a personality free from “super heroes”.

Also my daughter reminded me that when she was a nanny and said NO, she always told them WHY. She thought her boys deserved to know why to help them understand. That is a GREAT IDEA. I probably said no, “because I said so”, too often. If you tell them “because its dangerous, or too late, or whatever”, they can begin to understand the reason for rules.

I believe talking is THE BEST way to help your kids develop. Always be talking…in the car, at home, at dinner, ask questions, show them things…KEEP TALKING!

Much love and respect to all parents! Raising kids is the hardest, most rewarding job you will ever have. Kids NEED rules, don’t be afraid to make them. Your children are not your buddy, or your bestie, or your date. They are your responsibility and our future! Be THE PARENT!